A Christmas Poem

'Twas the night before Christmas at Rock Ridge Rest,
And all of us seniors were looking our best.
Our glasses, how sparkly! Our wrinkles, how merry!
The punch bowl held prune juice plus three drops of sherry.

A stocking was taped to each door in anticipation,
That Santa would bring us stool softener and Preparation.
We surely are lucky to be here with friends,
Secure in this assisted living and in our Depends.

Some kids came to sing songs of Christmas lore,
We tried to listen and sing along, but only could snore.
Carrie's Assistant had then borrowed our teeth,
And from them she'd crafted a holiday wreath.

The walkers, so shiny, all stood in a row,
Reflecting a candle's magnificent glow.
Supper was so festive -- the joy wouldn't stop --
It was creamy warm oatmeal with sprinkles on top.

Our salad was Jell-O, so jiggly and great,
Then puree of fruitcake was spooned on each plate.
The activity director then had us play games,
Like "Where Do You Live?" and "What Are Your Names?"

Dirty old George was feeling his oats,
Proclaiming that reindeer were nothing but goats.
The resident wand'rer was tied to her chair,
In hopes that at bedtime she still would be there.

Christmas lights on the new fallen snow
Made outdoors seem noon to the old folks below.
Then out on the porch there arose quite a clatter
(But we are so deaf that it just didn't matter).

A funny looking girl flew in through the door,
Then tripped on the sill and fell flat on the floor.
'Twas just our director, all togged out in red,
And she giggled and hugged and patted each head.

We knew from the way that she smiled and high-fived,
Our social security checks must have arrived.
We sang -- how we sang -- in our monotone croak,
Till the clock tinkled out its soft eight-p.m. stroke.

And soon we were snuggling deep in our beds,
Forgetting to take our night-time meds.
And so ends Christmas Eve at Rock Ridge Rest,
Tomorrow we'll forget it's Christmas, but we wish you the best.